We All Have A Most Embarrassing Moment Story, Right?
Posted: Wednesday, September 29, 2010
by Brianna Popsickle
The email read: " I'm in the washroom at work and the toilet won't flush. I can't go out because the VP's secretary saw me come in here. What should I do? Help!"
I held my sides as I laughed while reading the message from my friend sent an hour earlier. I couldn't wait to hear how it turned out.
I wondered why she'd thought to email me for advice. Maybe she assumed I'd been in a similar situation and would know what to do. She'd be right.
What does it say about someone who when asked to describe their most embarrassing moment, not only has one, but has to determine which moment was actually most humiliating?
What does that say about me?
I'm the first person to laugh at myself and I readily share most of my experiences with others. There was the time I complimented my doctor on the photo of his wife only to be told it was a photo of his son; the time I flew off the back of a treadmill at the gym, not once but twice; the time I stood outside the bathroom door in nothing but a t-shirt expecting my husband to walk out, only to have my daughter's boyfriend appear. There was the time my car died in the middle of the Santa Claus parade, not to mention the time I turned and walked face first into a sign after being asked out. Sadly, the list goes on and on.
Yes, I've had my share of embarrassing moments and this week there were a couple of more incidents to add to the long list.
I'd been visiting my parents and when it came time to leave my father handed me a bottled water for the long drive home. I usually stopped for a coffee at the trip's halfway point but decided to drink the water instead.
Keeping one hand on the steering wheel, I put the bottle between my thighs and squeezed as I twisted the lid. As it came off the water squirted up over the top and ran over my thighs, between my legs and onto the seat.
Just great, I thought and began drinking the water. I lowered the windows and let the cool air whip through, hoping to dry my pants. Shortly, between the water and the cool air, I was in dire need of a washroom. I was holding my breath as I pulled into the coffee shop. I got out and looked down. There would be no doubt. It looked exactly as if I'd peed my pants.
I caught a few strange glances on my way in and wanted to yell, "I didn't wet my pants. I spilled my water." But I couldn't be bothered. Instead I held my head high and looked directly into the eyes of everyone I passed, almost daring them to lose eye contact and glance down. I used the washroom and quickly left.
It was pretty embarrassing to say the least, but nothing compared to what happened the following morning.
I was in the shower when I thought I heard a banging sound. I turned off the water and listened. I didn't hear anything but my music, which I'd cranked way up. I resumed my shower. Minutes later I stood naked at the bathroom mirror taking my time applying lotion, drying my hair, and applying make-up.
Suddenly I heard the noise again. It was too close. I turned to see a ladder propped at the window. My heart stopped. Holding my breath, I peered out the window and looked down to see two men at the foot of the ladder.
Oh my God. Oh my God, I thought. The eaves-trough guys!
They had called a few days earlier to say they would be coming but with the last minute visit to my parents, I'd completely forgotten.
Please God, don't let them have already been up the ladder. I threw on my robe and opened the window. They heard me and looked up.
"Make my day," I begged. "Please tell me you just got here. You weren't already up the ladder?"
I'm sure they could tell I was near tears with embarrassment. They smiled.
Oh my God, I thought. Who was I kidding? I'd heard the banging ten minutes earlier. They didn't just get there, they'd already been up the ladder.
I felt my face go red. "Just do what you have to do and put the bill in the mailbox," I said, feeling sick.
Next time someone asks me to recall my most embarrassing moment I won't have to think twice. The eaves-trough moment will forever be etched in my mind.
That is, of course, if I get through the rest of my life unscathed. Judging by the week I've had, it doesn't look good.
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More commentsI have to agree with Dixie. The crown definitely belongs to you! Thanks for another good laugh, mostly because you are willing to tell these stories on yourself. :)I have nothing to hide. :) Thanks Joyce!
Once in the college faculty men's room stall, an inappropriate friendly voice from the next stall spoke to me, resounded with,
"Hello!" in a booming friendly voice. I waited. He said it again,
"Hello?"
"Hi", I answered back in a quiet, reserved, slightly nervous tone.
What are you doing?" he asked
"What do you THINK I am doing??, I retorted hesitantly but now annoyed.
"Can I come over, there?" asked the voice.
"What the hell's the matter with you?" Hell, NO!" "Who are you?" I rejoined.
""Can I come over", asked the voice, again.
"NO!" I added, emphatically, disturbed.
The voice from the next stall said,
"I have got to hang up the phone, now, sorry; I will call you back; some moron in the next toilet is hassling me, talk to you later; I gotta go !"
Needless to say, I was humiliated, glad that a partition separated us but my face glowed red with embarassment as he angrily slammed the door, washed his hands and left the room.I have hundreds of stories.PaulThat really is hilarious Paul. Thanks for sharing it. I needed a laugh at the moment and you provided it for me. :)
ha ha very good, I was lauging my head off.
My mum and I were travelling in Ireland. We were both desperate for the toilet but it was going to be some time before reaching a petrol station. We opted for a deserted farmhouse off the main road on a country lane. As we did our best to retain some dignity both at the same time thought we heard someone approaching. In the dark, in a farmouse, no roof, no doors? Who could be here? Before we knew it a cow, great big cow ambled in through the doorway. Well, in terror and relief that it was not a man, my mum and I fled down the country lane with cow in tow and knickers round our ankles!! We really did wet ourselves laughing when we got over the gate. What a sight for sore eyes that must have been.I'll best that's a day you and your mum will never forget! Hilarious! Thanks for reading and commenting Jill and for giving me a laugh.
Brianna you never fail to make me laugh. I love your confidence!~ GraceIt's not always easy, but it's good to laugh. I'm glad you enjoyed the article. Thank you!
Is screambucket your site BriannaScreambucket is home for two friends who like to write. Check it out!
Hello Brianna. Enjoyed the article. Can't say for sure if mine was the time the woman took her clothes off in my office, or the time I spilled KFC mashed potatoes and gravy in my lap while driving from St. Augustine to Sarasota. I was wearing navy blue slacks, and, like you, had to make a pit stop shortly thereafter. Water in your lap is bad, but mashed potatoes and gravy? I leave it to your imagination. - DonThat's too funny Donovan. It's good we can laugh at ourselves. Thanks for reading and commenting.
Wow. Lucille Ball reincarnated. You are TOOOO much. Gotta get you your own TV show. The last name: I won't ask.
Thank you Christofer. I'll take that as a compliment! I've been told before my life sounds like a sitcom. If there's going to be a TV show, I hope it happens sooner than later or it will have to be another version of Golden Girls. Thanks for reading and commenting, I appreciate it.
Thanks for the chuckles - I have come to expect them from your writing and was not disappointed this time!Thank you Marijo. It makes my day to know I gave someone a laugh. Glad you weren't disappointed!
Good stuff! I hate it when I ask a woman, "so when is the baby due?" only to find out that she is not pregnant. Well, I can argue it's their fault for having a big gut or whatever it was that made them look pregnant in the first place, but I suppose that would be mean. But come on now, how many times has that happened to you? You have at least thought someone was, at some point, but then found out that that's just how they look. I guess what I am trying to say is that there is some goofy looking people out there :-) Great article! Loved it! -BrombergOMG that's an embarrassing moment for both parties. Have you ever been slapped after asking that? It hasn't happened to me, we woman know not to ask, although I agree with you Bromberg, there are some people out there who fool you. I'm glad you enjoyed the article and thank you so much for joining my fan club. I appreciate it!
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