Gift Giving Gone Bad, It’s the Thought that Counts…
Posted: Saturday, December 19, 2009
by Brianna Popsickle
It's happened to all of us. Someone hands you a gift with a big smile on their face excited for you to unwrap the gift they've spent precious time and money choosing just for you. You slowly unwrap it, anticipation building, only to reveal a hideous gift. You force a smile and say thank you, in your most convincing tone.
This was a regular occurrence when my family, aunts, uncles and cousins gathered at my grandmothers for Christmas. She was in her eighties and insisted on buying and wrapping a gift for everyone. Sometimes she'd get the name tags mixed up so you never knew what to expect. If it was clothing she insisted you try it on. I'll never forget the expression on everyone's faces as my sister walked down the stairs wearing stretch pants that stretched all the way up to her armpits. The last couple of years my grandmother decided to give each of her fifteen grandchildren ten dollars. Great idea, only some got two envelopes, some got empty envelopes and some got envelopes with three ten dollar bills in them. Luckily we all knew that with gift giving, it's the thought that counts.
When I was eight there was just one thing I wanted for Christmas, a Barbie dollhouse. Christmas morning came and my sisters and I tore through our gifts. My heart sank as I realized I didn't get the one thing I'd hoped for. Just then my dad said, "It looks like Santa had trouble fitting one of the gifts under the tree, come check out the playroom Brianna!"
I ran to the playroom and there it was, a beautiful two-story dollhouse with windows, doors and furniture in every room! I turned to my parents and could see they were thrilled for me. I threw my arms around them and told them I loved it!
There was just one problem. Next to the dollhouse lay five, two-inch high rubber dolls that came with the house. It wasn't a Barbie house, it was a house for the little ugly dolls. My heart sank. I was disappointed for me, but I was even more disappointed for my parents. I never let them know Santa messed up and although I never really played with the dollhouse, I still have it today. Each year we go through things to put in our yard sale and my husband wonders why I don't just get rid of it. I'll never get rid of it because it meant so much to them to give it to me. Remember with gift giving, it's the thought that counts.
I tried to remind myself of that our first Christmas as newlyweds. My husband asked what I wanted and I said I'd like some thick wool socks for cross-country skiing. Careful what you ask for.
Christmas morning came and I opened a box and on top lay a pair of wool socks. I hugged him and continued to remove tissue paper. Another pair of wool socks. More tissue paper, more socks. I smiled. He'd gone to great lengths to trick me. There must be something really good at the bottom of the box. I removed the last layer of tissue, and you guessed it! More socks. Five pairs of wool socks!
I've told this story often and my husband will always add, "But tell them what else you got."
The funny thing is, I'm sure there was something else and I'm sure it was really good, but all I truly remember about that Christmas was five pairs of wool socks. But hey, it's the thought that counts.
Without a doubt my boss unknowingly gave me the worst Christmas gift ever. He sent the office staff to a spa for manicures and pedicures. I was the only one of the group that had never had either done before. He had arranged for us to have some things to eat and some wine while being pampered. The day was going well, until the girl doing my pedicure slipped and sliced off a chunk of my toe with the razor.
When the bleeding finally stopped the esthetician, who knew I was taking my daughter to the doctor later that afternoon, said I might want to mention my toe while I was there.
When the doctor saw my toe he said, "Brianna, you can pick up some nasty stuff in salons." Immediately he whipped out requisition forms for the Health and Safety Board to report the incident, which meant a health inspector would be visiting the salon. I was given a hepatitis shot and scheduled for two more shots. Blood tests were ordered to test for the Aids virus, among other things. I had to go not once, but three times over the course of nine months. I guess you could say my boss's gift was the gift that kept on giving. It caused me a lot of embarrassment explaining to the lab tech why I was being tested each time, and ended up costing me a hundred bucks.
My test results came back fine and I lived to tell the story. It was the last gift my boss ever gave me, probably just as well. I knew he'd had the best of intentions, and lucky for him, I knew it's the thought that counts.
Have you ever been the giver of a gift gone bad?
When my grandparents passed away everything was auctioned off. My father bid on an old radio that had sentimental value to him. He was outbid. I always felt bad about it. I knew how much he had wanted it.
Years later my boyfriend and I were at a flea market and I spotted a radio I thought was similar to the one my dad had missed out on. I bought it and my boyfriend spent months refurbishing it. When it was done I could hardly look at it without tears, I was so excited to give it to my dad. I envisioned that moment when he'd open it and realize it was the same as the one he'd missed out on years ago.
Christmas came and we all gathered at my parents. Everyone was tearing into gifts. I had wrapped the radio with care and placed it in back of the tree to give to him at just the right moment. I left the room to replenish my drink and when I came back I was shocked to see the radio unwrapped sitting next to the tree.
"Dad! You opened the radio," I said, holding back the tears.
"Oh was that from you Brianna?" he asked. My four-year old nephew had unwrapped it by mistake.
"That's nice," my dad said.
Nice? That's nice?
The moment I'd been looking forward to for months was lost. I thought about the hours my boyfriend had spent working on the radio, the time I'd spent envisioning the expression on my dad's face when he'd realize it was just like the old radio. Well my dad didn't get it. I'm not sure he even remembered the old radio. Obviously his being outbid that day bothered me more than him. My heart sank much as it did when I opened my Barbie house. But lucky for me I knew deep in my heart, it was the thought that counts.
So just a word of advice this Christmas, do yourself and everyone a favour. When you unwrap the wool sweater you're allergic to or pull the dust buster from it's box, or the book you have no interest in reading, just remember someone has put precious time and money into choosing it just for you. Force a smile, say thank you and understand, it really is, the thought that counts.
Merry Christmas!
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Top-level comments on this article: (4 total)If Barbie is so popular why do you have to buy her friends?OK maybe it's too early on a Sunday morning Paul, but I don't understand your comment. :)Maybe it's a guy thing. :)Ya think? :)Barbie accessories and playmates are extra(Ken, et al); you are never THIS turgid!Me turgid? Like I said, it was too early on a Sunday morning and I had no idea what you meant. Oh, and just for the record I was never fortunate enough to have a Ken doll. :)I shall henceforth wait until midweek.Barbie accessories and playmates are extra(Ken, et al); you are usually never THIS turgid!
OMG! I loved the story about your boss and the pedicure gift. I knew there was a reason I never get pedicures, they always cut my foot too deep with that darn razor blade. As a kid and a teenager, I never wanted to hear "It's the thought that counts." I just wanted a darn good present - period. If the gift sucked, I was pretty bratty about it... I'm ashamed to admit it. As I got older, like you, I became more gracious. The less I expect when gift giving time of year comes around, the better the gifts I seem to get. Now in my 40's I really know - it's the thought that counts. Fantastic and funny article. You did a great job.Thank you for reading and commenting Shalisha. I've never had a pedicure since. It's funny, I gave one of my best girlfriends a gift today and said, "Be honest, if you don't think it will fit (it was a painting), and she admitted it wasn't her 'style'. But she thanked me and said, "It's the thought that counts." We both cracked up because she had read my article. Sometimes you get it right, sometimes not. Merry Christmas Shalisha.I started laughing so hard when I read that part. Every time I give a gift I think to myself, "what is the worst thing that could happen." That would have to be way up there...I'm glad I gave you a laugh Anthony! Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment. I hope you have a great Christmas.
Thanks for writing this enjoyable, lesson-learned article. Well documented with actual occurrences. The pedicure business would most certainly be a cure for that type of gift for me too. You're right, the thought counts. I know giving gift cards (or cash) is a easier way out, but not if you really do it right. You've got to do the research to do gift cards right - you ask and watch and decide what business or restaurant, hotel, etc. is the perfect choice. Then you give the appropriate gift certificate or gift cards. If you're like me, giving a gift card can sometimes get more expensive than a gift since you don't want to look cheap either.You are absolutely right about gift cards! I like receiving them and more and more I give them as well. Thanks for taking the time to read and comment. Hope you had a great Christmas.It was a great Christmas, thanks. Happy New Year - have a great 2010.
Awesome Article!Thank you!
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